Be Engaged in the Now
“Thinking about where you’ve been or what you did wrong in the past are impediments to an inspired life. When you’re inspired, you’re totally engaged in the now. In an infinite, never beginning and never ending universe, there is no past.’’
Dr. Wayne W Dyer.
The 9 of Wands
I took the inspiration for this blog from the 9 of Wands which was randomly selected. Tarot is amazingly versatile and is a boon to the creative mind. I am never bored with how a card can synchronise so beautifully with what is happening in the moment and this 9 links so beautifully to the quote from Wayne Dyer who was an inspiration in his own right.
When this card appears for me I am put on alert that I need to find some strength and power in order to move forward.
If we work with the RWS image of the man surrounded by wands, he has a bandage on his head and looks world weary and beaten down.
Wands signify restless energy, libido and drive, creative fire, passion and personal power. Our man is propping himself up on a wand as if to take a breather whilst the other wands stand behind him; are they resources yet to be used or are they spent on old battles?
Central to this card is the theme of courage and confidence, strength and durability.
It tells of how we have perhaps been through many wars and conflicts, either created by our own hand or by others. However we have come to feel so world weary the reality is that we need to face what is to come, to stand strong amidst challenges to be the champion of our now.
2011 was a difficult time.
Back in 2011 I had Breast cancer.It was a difficult time. Looking back I can see how living with and subsequently recovering from dis-ease, has enriched my life. I think of the people I interacted with through that chapter with great affection. Some of them had to live with some very troublesome thoughts on the matter of life and death. Yet despite the inner suffering, many looked forward with optimism and a philosophical approach to the mountain that loomed in front of them.
I was no stranger to tough times and the frequent appearance of this card reminded me that life is full of journeys. Despite having weathered many storms this was just another one and I had to gather my wits and resources, look forward, not back and keep going no matter what. The same can also be said of my fearless and wise comrades who shared this part of my journey.
Journeys are stories. We all have a story to tell, the wands will find an expression to tell the tale.
The 9 of Wands also speaks of passion. During my treatment I occasionally fell into despondency. One day I was on a bus feeling vulnerable and uncertain. I was amazed that while gazing out of the window, looking for all the usual signs of normality and comfort, Sigmund Freud put in an appearance. At the same time I got the image of the 9 of Wands. Freud told me that the nature of my dis-ease was suppressed passion. During my life up to that point I had not really touched base with what made me tick. I didn’t fully understand at first that I was doing a job I loved, I had a family that I was proud of and had lovely friends.
I asked Freud what he meant.
He took me back to my childhood and he showed me where I had not been supported. He showed me where I had got distracted and how I had sabotaged myself with inappropriate life choices. My head and heart were totally disconnected and I realised then that I had no clear goal as to what I wanted to do with my skills. My creative self was in constant battle with my linear pragmatic self.
Spiritually I was in a crisis.
Freud told me that I was in need of re-connecting to my passion. It is a vehicle. Passion is a precursor to desire which in turn drives the will.
I had to ask myself what was my passion?
First I had to ponder on what passion meant. As I turned this question over, I began to get a glimmer of what a vision of myself in the future might look like. I knew that it was to continue with my work but in a much more creative and organic way. Also it was to inspire and be inspired and to totally love my life; cherish what I have achieved yet without attachment.
I took a lesson from the Emperor.
My passion and ideas needed structure, focus and discipline. Little by little I began to shape life after dis-ease. As I regained authority in my purpose, life took on a different colour; there was no going back…whatever the future held.
The message from the 9 of Wands may be to recognise when you have become disconnected.
When you have become separated from your intuition you have become separated from yourself. Reclaiming the intuition is revolutionary as it requires you to think for yourself.
It may be that disconnection has made you mistrustful, wary and uneasy. It’s at these times one should think of personal new world order; to engage with that inner fire and allow it to carry you forward with confidence and certainty.
Heal what has gone before by accepting it as the past but not giving it power in the future. Don’t compare experiences each is unique and has its own purpose to serve.
Trust is key here, there are no wrongs, no rights merely the energy of life itself. Take a step forward on your path and remember it is not always the destination that is important but the journey.