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The Art Of Conflict Resolution


"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."

Viktor Frankl

One of the joys and privileges of being a Tarot consultant and motivator is that you get to hear the stories of people. The primary job of a reader is to hold the energy of spirit as well as the client and of course oneself.

The universe has a dazzling repertoire of mirrors to send into the reading room; I am you and you are me.

Not everyone who comes for a sitting is in a difficult place. Some just want to know if everything is going to continue to be OK and if they are maximising potential. However there are those whose story is a little more complex.

The sticky, tricky stuff!

One of those areas is the sticky, tricky stuff that is conflict. There are millions of people all going in millions of different ways; this can create strife, dissent and divisiveness. Not only does this occur in the microcosm but also in the wider picture. We have to gauge our values, ideals and desires; we have to fit somewhere.

The spirit of competition.

Conflict arises when the spirit of competition has got out of all proportion. It can happen when someone will not do as expected, or, perhaps, where there are wounds from the conflicts of others and life must go on.

Very often we see differences as threatening; diversity can create an enemy and a victim all at the same time. Rivalry, dominant tendencies and the capacity to play to a warped perception of people and situations all ruffle the proverbial feathers and a spiral of bitterness, antagonism and even hatred can ensue. This clashing of opposed interests can make for a rich and intense reading. The reader draws on all their skills not just to remain detached but to bring about a resolution, a disentanglement from the situation and an undertaking to see things in a different light. The purpose is to find hope - a hope to be re-connected to core values without impediment or threat.

The inner turbulence must surface to be healed.

Life energy can be re-channelled and a transformation can take place whereby loss and deprivation can be avoided in the future.

Examples of Tarot cards that could be a catalyst for a conversation around conflict would be: 5 of Wands, 5 of Swords, 3 of Swords, Tower, Devil, Queen of Swords, 9 and 10 of Swords,10 of Wands, and so on.

Tarot is a great teacher of equilibrium.

We are shown how not to waste energy and how to consider our relationship to futility. Our potential is what we bring to the table of life.

FIVE STEPS IN A CONFLICT RESOLUTION CONSULTATION

PRIORITISE THE ISSUE

  • What is the issue?

  • What is the central theme?

  • How can you perceive the strengths inside the situation and is it necessary to see the circumstances as competitive?

  • Explore the path of least resistance.

FOCUS ON PRESENT

  • It is not always helpful to observe the past, there is a danger of spiralling into outmoded emotions.

  • Instead be in the now and look out for the triggers that create disharmony and resentment.

BATTLE STRATEGIES

  • Always being ready for combat is depleting. Pick your battles well is a useful adage which reminds us that the path of peace can be powerful.

  • Whilst we are gearing up for a fight we are missing out on other important elements in life.

  • Don’t waste energy!

FORGIVE

  • It is considered to be a normal response of being wronged that we seek revenge or punishment?

  • Retribution just perpetuates the suffering and darkens any vision of hope, love or freedom.

  • Our choice at this stage is about attitude. Look for the hooks.

  • What is it that binds us to negative attitudes?

  • Forgiveness is the great liberator, giving us freedom from the burdens of discontent and bitterness.

LET GO

  • We can’t move on until we have let go.

  • What does it look like to be free from the negative feelings of conflict?

  • What can we replace those feelings with?

  • What is our vision of the future?

  • What are we doing in our ideal world?

A consultation is about client empowerment and these steps can be used as a guideline for your client to consider their story and what they want to achieve from their reading.

It is all about the love; it is love that connects us to all that is.

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