“Happiness is good management of expectations and good management means making order and assembling the contingent elements of the "do’s'" and the "don'ts", the "maybe yes'" and the "maybe not's". When we really want to live in agreement with ourselves and find peace with the surrounding world, good management is liberating. (" Expectations")”
― Erik Pevernagie
The dos and don’ts of a Tarot reading.
This could be a list of all the things that we think is right or not as the case may be. The list is not infallible. Readings require good management and if you have insights into how you practice and a structure in place, then all should be well, or at least one can be in a place where stuff is ok to deal with.
As I thought about the notion of dos and don’ts the Emperor came to mind. He is the one that tells us to apply structure and strategy to all that we do and indeed good management is liberating.
The integration of the Emperor into our readings asks us to think about responsibilities and mindfulness for others.
Readings are, in a sense, a communal relationship and we step into the compassion for all beings. We do not possess or exert our will on that reading moment. As facilitators we are opening the door to a path less travelled...for the client.
This requires a dedication from the reader that they are willing to be of service, this requires a clear sense of purpose and a sensitivity to the lives of others.
This brings up the subject of empathy.
I am a bit wary of empathy in a reading. There is a danger of us absorbing all the material of the client, making it about ourselves and creating a pain body that is unique to the reading in that moment. We as readers must get ourselves out of the way. It is not for us to take the reading home, or store it away in the cupboard of our mind or even over identify with someone else’s story. We are here to witness the dynamics of transformation and it is there that a possible healing with self can take place as well as for the client.
I think that readings should have a point and a beginning, a middle and an ending.
A bunch of trite observations will not cut it. From my experience of working with Spirit both as a medium and as a Tarot consultant there is indeed a point. We are being brought to attention, a bit like the Judgement card, we receive the call that we must grow awareness to an aspect of ourselves and our life. Those around us will trigger a new perspective and confirmation of life’s circumstances will bring a sense of where we are and who we are. Clarity.
This does not mean that readings have to be done as if by rote. They are by nature organic and free falling but that means we have to put the story together so that it is comprehensive and meaningful.
It might be worth taking a minute to sit down and ask yourself why are you offering readings? What is your goal? Perhaps you are answering a call to destiny and if this is so then your purpose will be revealed as you walk the path.
I have found that being mindful of the language and phrases we use can be so very important.
For instance one of the phrases that I totally avoid is ‘I am picking up.’ I find this lazy and it lacks in some way. There are so many other beautiful ways to say that you are connected. Constantly telling someone that you are ‘picking up’ will not do your session any favours. And that is the thing, that phrase connotes the act of telling. In my very humble opinion, there is more to a consultation than just telling as this indicates the moment is more about you and less about the other person. Take a minute to think of phrases one could use that describe your connection for example ‘I am getting a sense of…’
A QUICK ROUND UP OF DOS AND DON’TS.
Do inform your client of how you work.
Do make them comfortable and welcome.
Do let them take part in the reading.
Do encourage conversation and feedback as you go along.
Do explore how to expand your readings, aura readings, spirit communication etc.
Do let Spirit in, we can’t do this work without Spirit.
Don’t talk over your client.
Don’t presume you know more about the issues than the person does.
Don’t over empathise as you could create a new pain body.
Don’t feel successful if they cry; outbursts of emotion are not benchmarks of success.
Don’t cry in a reading that carries pain. It’s not your story.
Don’t be too quick to hug someone; doing that all day is depleting and unhealthy.
Don’t be too ready to tell your problems in the past because the session is not about you.
Don’t limit your talents and skills as they are the pathway to being good at what you do.
Maybe you can think of other points that could go on the list. Do make a note of them.
The most important thing, however, is to enjoy what you do and love the journey.